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How to be more confident, supporting Women in Business & Beyond. Bridging the gap between Ambition and Wellbeing.

Comparing to impair - The status of your self-belief

28/2/2017

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Have you been experiencing challenges with your levels of self-belief and self-confidence?  Do you often compare yourself to others usually elevating what they have and what they have achieved far above what you believe about yourself?

How often do we compare ourselves to others whom we believe to be living in the perfect kingdom when peaking in through the tiny window to their world? Rather than stirring you up to achieve more, does this comparison grip and impair you, so much so that you do nothing but overanalyse and compare even more?  Would you be surprised to know that you are not alone?
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We often compare ourselves to others without even realising what we are doing.  Very few of us use what we observe in others as a way to actually focus on what we want for ourselves, strengthen our weaknesses or elevate our own self-beliefs. Instead the time is spent thinking negatively about how we view ourselves, about what we don’t have and how we aren’t where we want to be in life.
Instead of using comparatives to feel bad about ourselves what if we used the success of others to strengthen our resolve and find a way to elevate our own self-beliefs.  As it is, what we believe to be true about ourselves has taken us to where we are today, whether it is where we want to be or not. Our self-belief either creates or denies our power and greatly influences what we believe ourselves to be capable of. Our self-belief also profoundly affects our level of self-confidence.

When used in a way that is not conducive to our success, comparing can be impairing and it is more than likely by doing this we are not living our lives as we truly desire.  If you are comparing and not happy with your own achievements, perhaps you are missing out on or not creating and grasping opportunities that will elevate you and what you want for yourself.

If you find yourself regularly comparing yourself to others, which is then followed by a negative shift in your emotions, detracting you from your goals and what you want, you will most certainly benefit from doing some work to explore this with a view for change.

Explore your thoughts and behaviours that are contributing to moving you away from what you want. Don’t run away from delving into these thoughts. Be honest with yourself, look for and engage support if need be.

Where did these thoughts first emerge?  What are they protecting you from? What do you want to change? How committed are you to this change?

Following this up with ways to invoke more empowering thoughts and actions will support you in elevating your self-belief, allowing you to accomplish more of what you want for yourself rather than continuing in this cycle of comparing to impair.

A great way to introduce new habits once you recognise your pattern of behaviour is to immediately commit to a mindset change so you start to send signals to yourself that you want and are ready for change. You may not know what to do at first but committing to change is a first step.

Habits will begin to change once you adjust and embed your mindset and thoughts to a new pattern that is more affirming for you. If these new more affirming and empowering thoughts don’t immediately snap into place, stay focused on the change that you want. Commit yourself to the change that you want to see, feel and experience.  It might seem unusual and unnatural to begin with but remember you want to remove old habits that might have been with you for some time and engage new ones.

The idea is to develop consistency and reiterate this new mindset and behaviour pattern. New more beneficial and constructive thoughts will start to prevail, which will induce new habits and behaviours steering you away from the old.
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Focus each day and as often as possible on introducing new thoughts and trying on new patterns of behaviour. How do these new patterns make you feel? Stick with this even when you might be tempted or swayed back to old habits. Start to build strong foundations for your mind. Think of it as an adventure rather than a chore keep in mind what you want in life and where you want to end up.
Creating authentic self-confidence, resilience and wellbeing. How to deal with Imposter Syndrome.
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    I'm older and wiser than I look. After many years working in the corporate world I decided to branch out on my own.......Brave eh?

    My tenacity, resilience and incredible sense of fulfilment from what I do, keeps me doing.

    Here you can learn different perspectives to support your mindset and approach to life, which will enable you to experience a greater sense of balance,  fulfilment, wellbeing and contentment, If of course you take action.

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